HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Happy 2005, everybody!

Just right off the bat, I want to say I could care less about which sports team TV journalists, such as Tim Russert, support. Whenever he says, "Go Bills." I go and wish he would elaborate on his last guest's suggesting that we'll have another attack. Go Bills? Go Report The News!

2005 New Year's Resolution

1. Clean Up. I have a full bag of trash and a stack of dirty dishes. by the end of this year, they will be gone.

2. Career. By the end of the year I will have a company card, a company car, and a company.

3. Marry up.

4. Get some breakfast for once.

5. Pack my own lunch. I believe if I pack my own lunch, it will help me marry up and be a kept man.

6. Increase my presence in the tabloids. There is no such thing as bad publicity. Or in my case, there's no such thing as publicity.

7. Find a new website visitor of the week.

8. Answer Mark Lenz's question in my advice column from last March.