Monday's Message to the Internet

I'm at my desk. Nobody has bothered me yet today, which is a first. My job bescially consists of people bothering me all day. They usually bother me in the passive voice which I can't stand. Somewhere in time, American society decided that in order to be polite, complaints and questions had to be stated in a passive voice. I guess people are too humble to implicate themselves when they need something. It drives me nuts. Often someone will come to my desk and say "The copier machine is broken," "The ceiling in my office is leaking," "Instant coffee has spilled in the lounge." OK, I know only one of those examples is a gramamtical example of passive voice, but you know what I mean. People won't go "Can you help me with the copier/ the hole in my ceiling/ my incapacity to do things on my own?" Instead they just state something and expect you to offer some solution to their problem. I can't stand it. If you need something, ask for something.

Another thing that has been bothering me is that people will stop at nothing to get a seat on the New York City subway. What's the big deal? Why is sitting down on the train such a treasure? As soon as the doors to the train open, it's like the conductor set off a starter pistol and everyone jumps out of the starter blocks to get a seat. Why? Why must everyone sit down? Here's my take if you are riding the New York City subway system once you are on the train you are probably going to be on the train itself for 15 minutes, on average. Stand, people! Stand for fifteen minutes and flex your abs or clench your buttocks, work on your posture. Don't race for a seat and look all happy like you won something if you get one. Don't have that haggard look on your face like you deserve a seat. Don't squeeze your larger than the seat size self into a seat because you refuse to stand. For Pete's sake! What's so special about sitting down?